California Soprattutto!

Califorinia uber alles!

Or as the Italians say, California, soprattutto!

Today, the world witnesses the Californication of the Italians: smoking was officially banned from public indoor spaces in Italy.

As the rest of Western Europe recoils in horror.

Italy had better watch out: it may be on the Euro, but banning smoking is downright anti-European! I'm sure the French will have nothing to do with this trend. The French love to smoke. Especially in Paris. Smoking is as French as croissants and baguettes and dog shit on the streets. Vive la cigarette!

Not that I'm defending it. I've never smoked. No, that's a lie. I tried a cigarette once when I was 15. It was vile. And anyway, I'm not the addictive type. I hate smelling cigarette smoke and I'm glad that California bans it indoors. But those poor Italians! How are they supposed to sip their espresso if they can't have a good drag to go along with it? Today thousands of crinkly-faced men huddle around tiny outdoor tables, bemoaning their fate.

Do the Italians realize the dangerous precipice on which they stand? That banning smoking will directly result in tofu pizzas, surfer ragazzi, and eventually an actor who becomes their governor-- or their president?

Quoting a story from Reuters: "It's not an easy task," [a bar owner] said when asked how he would deal with a young [Mafia] gangster determined to light up in his bar. "I don't want to risk four bullets in my leg."

Now there's a picture for ya: a bunch of nicotine-deprived Soprano-types literally riding shotgun in the bars.

Pop, pop, pop....

Salute!